Batman: OCD Knightmare

There. Just completed 100% on Batman:Arkham Knight. Collected all 243 goddamn Riddler trophies, threw the last of the major criminals into GCPD lockup, and activated the full KNIGHTFALL ending cutscene.

Hopefully now I can try actually enjoying this game.

Let me explain what I mean. The Batman Arkham games are beautiful graphically, and have pretty good plotlines, and (except for the forced Batmobile-tank parts of Arkham Knight) have great combat and exploration mechanics.

They really make you feel like you can play as Batman, but that's only AFTER you've actually completed the game.

You gotta earn it, son.

Video Games: Quest Marker Overload

For some time now I've been feeling like I must be getting old. Its not because of my creaky joints, or lack of athletic ability (that's always been there), or even my curmudgeonly attitude toward kids-on-my-lawn (spoiler: I want them off of it). No, its been because video games just don't hold my attention like they once did. No matter how flashy and excited they seem to be, after just a couple hours I'm just not into it anymore. I've just started Batman Arkham Knight and already can tell I'm going to lose interest before too long. Lose interest? In BATMAN? Not possible, right? Well, rare is the new AAA game that comes out that I actually care enough about to finish. So what is wrong with me?

Wait, why are you VIDEO-calling an unmasked Barbara Gordon all the time while traipsing around the city, Batman? And she calls you "Bruce" regularly in the calls? How do you even still have a secret identity?

Turns out, I've decided I can take a smug look outward and say "Nothing is wrong with me, everything is wrong with the games designed these days!" (my walking cane raised angrily overhead). But its true. Game design these days focuses on two things that didn't exist in the past golden games of yesteryear: Quest Markers and Fast Travel.

Witcher'd

Witcher 3 is out! Holy crap is Witcher 3 good. Also Holy Crap does it take every ounce of all four fans running in the ol' Steambox at full blast to keep the GPU from melting after two minutes of swordfighting wolves.

 

 

 

Walking around the swamp = 60 fps (beautiful!)

Fight a giant monster = ~33 fps (no problem)

Fight a pack of wolves = 1-2 fps (probably going to die)

  But still. Its worth it. For Temeria!

Tron 2.0 on Steam!

It finally happened! An excellent old-school PC game (a game you've likely never heard of) just got released on Steam and is now playable on all computers. This is one of my favorite PC games of all time, and I group it on my mental PC gaming mantle alongside Baulder's Gate, Thief, and Fallout. It is the only first-person action RPG that actually brings the Grid to life. That game is Tron 2.0.

Digital Talisman

As any modern board-gamer knows, boardgame cleanup can be a real pain in the ass. When you were a kid the most complex cleanup boardgame you likely owned was Monopoly, and that cleanup was no problem because no one wants to play that game anyway. But for the advanced gamers out there, for the 8-year olds who saw "For ages 12 and Up" on the side of the box and were undismayed, there was a boardgame of epic fun that you could play with your more studious friends. This is a great game, with tons of expansions available, and was my first foray into a boardgame with lots of cleanup. That boardgame was Talisman.

Thief - The Dark Mod

A game came out back in 1999 that defined a genre of gaming for low-fantasy D&D nerds like me.  No, it wasn't Baldur's Gate, Half-Life, or System Shock II.  Although those were all excellent PC games released around that time, only one game was capable of keeping a young nerd locked away in his tiny room immersed in its dark fantasy world, rather than joining his rugby girl roommates who were perpetually partying throughout the rest of the crappy house they were renting.

That game was: Thief - The Dark Project.